Swerve: The Types of Bad Drivers in Montana
George Carlin said "have you ever noticed that anybody driving slower than you is an idiot, and anyone going faster than you is a maniac?" and in fact, I have often noticed that. I like driving— it's those pesky other drivers that's the problem. I get along with pretty much everyone I meet, but the second we share the road together you become my mortal enemy. That's dramatic, but you get the idea. Here are the types of bad drivers in Montana:
The Transplant
I won't rag too hard on out-of staters, I'll leave that to pretty much every other Montanan. People who just moved here can be great drivers but the issue is the snow. It's hard driving on the snow for the first time, especially if your rig isn't up to the task. Here's an article that can help you prep your vehicle for winter driving.
The Pick-Up Trucker
If only the pick-up truck alone could make their drivers feel secure in their masculinity, but no. They have to drive like aggressive maniacs so that everyone knows how tough and macho they are.
The Speedy McFasterson
No time for safety, these ambitious movers have places to be. The irony is they'd arrive at their destination much quicker if they didn't get stopped by the police on the way there.
The Slow Poke
Oh hey, it's me. Here's a FAQ for people who wonder why I drive so slow:
"Do you know how annoyed I am? Don't you care?"
Yes, I know you're annoyed. No, I don't care.
"Will you drive faster?"
If I feel like it, and riding my bumper is no way to get me in the mood.
The Pac Man
You know how Pac Man eats those dots in a line? That's kind of like the guy who drives down the center of the road, with the painted divider lines perfectly between the car's wheels. I know the lines can be hard to see when in it's snowy out, but as soon as they're visible let's all agree to have two lanes again.