Every month has a unique flavor in Montana, here's what I mean:

January

The year starts in the bitter cold, but at least the skiing's great. Good to get out and enjoy some snow-related activities if you can, because there's not much else to do— especially in the earlier half of January because it seems like there's 2 weeks of recovery after New Year's Eve.

February

I'd say this is the worst month in Montana, this is when I've noticed we get the gnarliest weather. What a cruel joke that this is the month Valentine's Day happens, if you think love is in the air that might be a symptom of hypothermia.

March

While the first official day of spring is in March, that's certainly not true in Montana. We need our own Groundhog Day but no matter where he looks we'll say that means winter happens until at least mid April. This is also the month of Saint Patrick's Day, and if you can hang, that's when you visit Butte.

April

Once you've made it this far, you know you've likely been through the worst in terms of weather for the year. That's why every April 2nd I breathe a sigh of relief, not on April 1st though because that day I need to be on high alert as I am NO ONE'S fool. This is the month of the cannabis-celebration day "420," not that any Montanans ever partake *wink

May

This is when the festivals and concerts really start, which are so fun here. And I wish I could say this is the month the weather really turns around, that this is when you can depend on gentle breezes on warm days. What you usually get is cold, rainy days or blazing hot, summer-stye days with nothing in between. That's fine with me as long as no one says "May the 4th be with you" because that phrase makes me cringe into oblivion.

June

This is usually a beautiful month in Montana and I wouldn't visit any sooner in the year if I was a tourist. The pride parades on the 28th are totally gay and I mean that in the best way possible.

July

Hot and dry in July, this is when Montanans can start floating rivers which is so fun. Montanans celebrate independence day right, with enough fireworks to show those rotten redcoats we don't need no tea tax or whatever.

August

The first half of this month is stupid hot, so get back in the river, dummy. Towards the end of the month college students start arriving which adds some energy to Montana's college towns. If you encounter a college student, ask them to do a lit TikTok dance. Apparently those are all the rage.

September

It's still hot usually, but not nearly as overwhelming as earlier in the summer. There's plenty of stuff to do, be that academic or extracurricular. Just don't break out that flannel until the first official day of fall... or on second thought, do whatever you want. I'm not your stylist.

October

You never know when winter is going to strike from this point forward. Every day you get closer to the frosty armageddon, which is way scarier than any Halloween haunted house.

November

I call November the ugliest month in Montana, to explain, here's a quote from Family Guy's Peter Griffin:

God, I love this time of year. It's just past all the amazing colors of fall, and before the white of winter. Just brown and gray. Magical.

Thanksgiving makes it all worth it.

December

A white Christmas is almost certain, and don't be surprised if the rest of the month is pretty white too. Holiday festivities and holiday cheer, and I mean even before the Montanans have their first eggnog.

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